Entering Processional (please rise)
(to the tune of the Holy Grail monks)
E-C-S colon Modcon
Gill and Brian labs are done *whack*
(repeat)

Eulogy for Labs
Reader: Folks, we are gathered here today to honor the passing of the ECS Labs. They were always there for us, a constant presence in our lives, and now they are gone forever. We are here to share our support for each other in this time of grief. Let us share our memories of the times we had with labs.

(sharing of memories)

ECS labs have touched our lives and changed us forever, and for that we are grateful. Now they have gone to a better world. For this we are eternally grateful. Let us bow our heads in a moment of silence as the labs are lowered to their final resting place.

(they are.)

The labs are dead. Long live the project! Let us call upon the aid of Gill Pratt and Brian Storey, that they may aid us with our projects.
 
Intercession for Passing Grades
Reader: We are gathered here today in the name of ECS to turn our experimental data back to the light.

Chorus (that’s you): For our data has wandered far from the righteous path; it strays from the truth of Simulink.

Reader: Let us call upon the name of Brian.

Chorus: For he can show our data the error of its ways.

Reader: My Simulink does not cooperate. See how its arrows point into the integrator! Yet no correct graph issues forth from simout; my experimental data stands lonesome in the pouring rain.

Chorus: O Brian, help us, for our data follows not the righteous path.

Reader: Let us call upon the name of Gill. 

Chorus: For he can show our circuit the error of its ways.

Reader: See my plot! Watch how it curves. My data follows not this way, for it is corrupted with much extraneous noise.

Chorus: O Gill, help us, for our data follows not the righteous path.

Reader: Yea, though we walk through the shadow of the valley of nonfunctional data acquisition cards, we fear not MATLAB, for thou art with us. Thy jumper wires and thy pliers, they comfort us.

Chorus: O Brian, help us.

Reader: We call upon the aid of Brian Story, and Gill Pratt, and all the NINJAs and sophomores who have gone before us into the year beyond.

Chorus: For thine is the MATLAB, and the power, and the PID control forever.

Reader: Brian Storey, who fixes the .ms of the world...

Chorus: Have mercy on us.

Reader: Gill Pratt, who fixes the breadboards of the world...

Chorus: Have mercy on us.

Reader: O ECS, you take away the sanity of our world.

Chorus: Grant us sleep.

Ending
Reader: The labs are ended. Go in peace to finish up thy work.
(music and exeunt)